Drained... but SMILING!

First of all I want to thank all of you who have stopped by to read and catch up with me. I also want to thank all of my prayer "warriors" for your mighty prayers and encouragement, and endearing words of wisdom and faith. I know that God has me exactly where he wants me at this time. I must remind myself, it could be worse. Some people didn't make it through the night to see the light of day... So YES I am truly Blessed to be able to share my thoughts with my wonderful friends and family.

This past Tuesday, March 18, I had my last dose of Adromiacyn and Cytoxin (not sure of spelling) but the really BAD stuff. Today is the first day that I actually even felt up to getting out of the bed, let alone sit up in front of the computer. My dear friend, co-worker and annointed prayer warrior Gwen stopped by to bring dinner... we caught up, prayed and just enjoyed. I love the visits.

Mother came to check on me and the kids per her normal routine, she has been consistent in being here for me and the family and for that I'm so very grateful. I just realize each day how very Blessed I am to be able to go through the ringer with Breast Cancer, Chemo, Surgeries and such and still have a smile on my face.

One of my friends from college sent me a message on Facebook and he said, keep smiling, every day no matter what. That really touched me, because you know... I have so much to smile about.

Grace and Peace ~ LaTishia

C'mon Baby Lite My Fire....

Ha... you probably thought it was going to be some uber juicy post... NOT! Actually, that was the song on TV just seconds ago. It's a quarter til 2(am) and the American Masterpiece (late night TV) was doing a piece on The Doors and the hippie revolution. I was sitting here thinking about what to write about... because at this point I really didn't know. I knew I wanted to blog; but about what?  Thus the title.

So I read the comments from my Ice Cream post... Thank you!  Not too much to talk about. I had a great day today. Got out most of the day with Landon and just enjoyed some fresh air and the warm weather. Lauryn went on her first field trip Wednesday, and Landon and I joined her at Countryside Farms. It was such a nice day... I will post pictures here. My son fed the goats, he's such a big boy now (4) and Sissy and her classmates had a blast. It was a blessing to be feeling up to the day and going with her. I packed our lunches and had a picnic lunch with her class. Landon joined right in as if he's in her Kindergarten Class. They all know him and I from the days that I volunteer and take him with me. He's definitely ready for Pre-K in the fall.

Looking forward to the great weather this weekend; as there are a couple of festivals locally, and I want to enjoy before next Tuesday's chemo. After my treatment on 5-18, I will have 12 consecutive weeks of treatment. I'm told that this cocktail isn't as detrimental to my mind, body & moods as what I'm currently going through. I hope not because it's like a rollercoaster ride that keeps going. I'm up, then down, and loop-d-loop for a few days and then back down, and finally it ends for a while. And here we go again...

check out what my hair looks like... still not completely bald. A few straggly hairs hanging on... My girlfriend said it looks like a teddy bear. But I'm thinking more like a baby bird... Bawk Bawk!!!

Love and Hugs

2 Words ~ "Ice Cream"

On the eve of a very celebrated and special day ~ Mother's Day; I have the blahs, the blues, the I don't have a bone in my body that wants to celebrate or maybe it's I don't want to be celebrated, fussed over etc. Don't get me wrong... I am grateful to be alive to see another Mother's Day and all that jazz. However, it's beyond that. I'm not myself. I don't have a desire to shower or brush my teeth, let alone get dressed and leave the house.  My FAITH is not waivering... it remains stronger than ever. But the human nature in me is experiencing that lackluster feeling of why bother. Food means nothing at this point, because my stomach stays in knots. Still no vomitting, thank goodness, but nothing tastes good. Well maybe except ice cream!

This week has been up and down since chemo on Tuesday. Mother stayed until Friday and got Lauryn to and from school, while making sure both she and Landon wanted for nothing. It's a blessing to know that my kids are loved and cared for and don't really feel any difference in their surroundings while i'm going through. I thank Mom for that, especially with the hubby's work schedule. 

Friday I pulled myself together, as company was coming over. Gerri dropped off a wonderful dinner with all of the trimmings from one of my co-workers, I even got a card and Tulips (one of my favs) for Mother's Day!  Shortly after one of my spirit filled, led by the Holy Ghost prayer warriors and her family stopped by to bring more food (stir fry veggies for me) and visit. The children played after dinner and we had a great time chatting and studying God's word. She is on a mission against the root and cause of cancer and why it manifests in some.  I will expound upon this later...

My sleep is always interrupted and seems that it has been almost daily since my children have been born. I look forward to the day when I am able to slumber hours without interruption from anything!!! One day... One day...  So a nap today was essential. I put my lovebugs down, started reading a book and then eventually went to sleep. My nap was going great... and then my phone rang! It was my dad calling to see if I watched the Susan G. Komen race for the cure in Sacramento. He had all of the stats etc. I told him, I was aware of it but had not watched... were you asleep? Uhhh yeahh I was. Oh well... we all know that once you have been awaken, most likely you will not be going back to sleep, as much as you would love to.  A few minutes later Lauryn walked in, got in bed with me and we snuggled. I was thinking Landon was on her heels, but he wasn't.

As we laid there a few moments exchanging smiles... I had an idea!! How would you like to go downstairs before Bubba wakes up and have some ice cream! Her face lit up... my tastebuds sparked a familiar taste and we pinkie promised that we wouldn't tell Bubba. So we quietly went to the kitchen (keeping a five year old quiet is a task in itself) and I scooped the remaining ice cream out of a couple containers we had into our ice cream bowls. Carmel topping - Check! I warmed it, reached for the nut topping, looked at babygirl... do you want nuts? Nope... good me either. So we had ice cream with carmel topping... Landon never came down (until like a few seconds ago at least 30 minutes after our secret mission), we both enjoyed, threw out the empty containers outside (no evidence) and guess what???

As a result of the ice cream I had a burst of energy to blog... and guess what else? I used a plastic spoon!

Grace and Peace ~ Happy Mother's Day

LaTishia

3rd Chemo Today

Today's chemotherapy infusion went much smoother than the last. I arrived, had my blood drawn very quickly, by a new nurse (Nurse Heather had the day off). The great news is that nurse heather left some detailed notes about my port.  So once I got plugged up and ready to go, I went to the cafateria and grabbed some breakfast and my day began. SF was nice today... the drive over was easy, not much traffic as the weather conditions were great.  My father had to fill in for Lawrence who had to be at work by 3pm. His schedule is all over the place; so having my mom, dad and others as a support team is a Blessing!!!

I completed Phase 1 of my Clinical Trial... so now 14 more days of logging and answering questions. :O)

So here are my changes; I'm 95% bald. There are starting to be patches where it's clean on my head, so I had it shaved down even more and really ready for it all to just fall out. Dug in my drawers and found another cute scarf I can wear. It's going to be too hot for a wig most days... so I'll be rocking a scarf. I'm also going to post pictures when I'm completely bald so you all can see.

The fun part will be watching it grow back which will probably be after my taxotier/herceptin session get underway, because they don't have the same affect on your hair folicles.

My nails are black ~ and I'm afraid to even get a pedicure because of seeing what my toenails look like. Besides to prone for infection.

Well that is it... the usual today; had to take my chemo IV into the bathroom a couple times, that stuff runs through you and I took a good nap today. Like and hour and a half. The ride home was decent, my babies were happy to see me; and I'm about to lay it down.

The nausea has started, so I have to get a handle on it... Lot's of fluids is the name of the game. My feet are puffy...

~ Grace and Peace ~

Thank you again for the wonderful birthday wishes, cards, calls, seeds (money) and most importantly prayers!! I'm grateful.

The Journey Continues...

So in less than 24 hours I'll be hitting another year of God's Grace (Birthday)! I'll be 41 and I have so much to live for. This past week was rough, but I made it through. Sunday morning I woke up with the Blah's... and even shed a few tears. But I'm good. I'm thankful...

I'm thankful for my life first and foremost, and God's grace and mercy on me. I'm thankful for the handfull of TRUE BLUE girlfriends who I love, admire and adore... I just wish I had the opportunity to spend more "girl" time with them. But that is life... you grow up, you get married, you have children (not always in that order of course) and you just go with the flow of life. But somewhere along the way, I recall that email about keeping and letting your closest girls know how much you appreciate and love them. Because marriages/relationship fail, children grow up (and have thier own lives), parents grow old etc. But your BFF's are for life. So I'm thankful for all of my sista girls (and a few guys) who are in my life and I call friends. Of course I have the Absolute BEST co-workers (many who are also my friends/confidants and Angels in disquise) who I love and can count on. 

Of course my loving and caring husband and two beautiful angels are what keep me going; but it's that EXTRA we get and so much need from our gal pals that keeps us sane!!!

Feeling very mushy and need to take a nap before my keyboard explodes!!!